how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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