HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
