I faked an abortion last night.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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