Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
