sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
