a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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