on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
