best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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