You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
