for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize
