How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
