I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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