Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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