dude i'm inner monologue high
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
