your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
