The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize