At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize