Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
