do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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