Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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