It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
