one might say we're banned from that church
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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