Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
