I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
how drunk are you?
Several
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
