that's an acceptable place to lick
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
