u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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