So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
