Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
