Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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