I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
