Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
