somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
