I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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