That's intense
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
