if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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