Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
