just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize