My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
