bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
