Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Randomize
