we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
