found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
