I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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