I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
