You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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