Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
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