Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
