watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
