I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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