he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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